Nia Long Reflects on Life, Grace, and Her Role in "Michael"

Leaving a movie theater in the middle of the day often brings about a unique sense of disorientation, where the real world feels too intense after a two-hour immersion into a constructed reality. It is in this state that I meet Nia Long for an early lunch at the serene Chateau Marmont. Having just watched Michael, a new biopic about Michael Jackson, I find the world outside starkly bright and busy, but my thoughts remain with the film. Long, who portrays Katherine Jackson—the matriarch of the Jackson family—arrives dressed casually yet elegantly in an oversized blazer and jeans, her Miu Miu cap tilted low.

As we talk, I can’t shake the feeling of déjà vu, with the image of Long on screen intertwining with the dynamic woman before me.

In her role as Katherine Jackson, Long displays a remarkable ability to convey depth through silence. During her first appearance in the film, she silently observes her sons rehearsing, her expression speaking volumes. Her stillness juxtaposes well against the more animated performances around her, showcasing her talent for infusing silence with significance. In contrast to her on-screen character, Long exudes warmth and authenticity, drawing upon her natural charm and keen emotional insight. She embodies a mix of straightforwardness and humor, revealing herself as both relatable and deeply reflective—a true Scorpio who notices everything.

When discussing her portrayal of Mrs. Jackson, one word reverberates: grace. Long reflects, “There have been moments in my life where I’ve been required to be more graceful than I’ve ever had to be in the past. It requires deep self-examination—what do I stand for? My children come before anything.” She emphasizes that both Katherine and Michael Jackson's journeys are steeped in profound grace, suggesting that true resilience often resides within quiet strength.

Long's impact on our cultural landscape is profound. She stands out as a defining figure for many who grew up in the '90s, illustrating an ideal blend of beauty, talent, and a relatable feeling unique to that era. Her iconic roles in films like Love Jones and The Best Man hold significant nostalgia. "My commitment to work isn't for accolades or attention," she says while enjoying her salmon lunch. "Because of my commitment to truth and purpose, I think people see something in my work that makes them feel inspired."

Long is acutely aware of Hollywood's unpredictable nature, especially for Black actors. “There's highs and lows,” she acknowledges. "I’m having a great year, but I don’t know what’s happening next year." This awareness drives her to approach her craft intentionally, ensuring that her representations are true and meaningful.

“The only strategy I have in this game is my bank account,” she jokes, connecting her work to a strategy for fostering generational wealth. She balances that with a serious dedication to her craft—she wants to authentically represent the depth and diversity of the Black experience, conscious of every aspect of her portrayal.

With her eldest son now in his 20s and her youngest at 14, Long feels ready to embrace new opportunities in her career. She's keen on producing more films and immersing herself in telling more stories. One project she's particularly excited about is Don’t Ever Wonder, a romantic dramedy where she reunites with Love Jones co-star Larenz Tate. Directed by Eugene Ashe, the film, featuring a strong ensemble cast including Blair Underwood and Susan Kelechi Watson, explores themes of second chances in love and the complexities of life after children leave home. “This is not a continuation of Love Jones,” she clarifies, explaining that it's about navigating life's next chapters.

As our conversation continues, it shifts toward honesty—the defining quality she values in her stories and life. Amid our lunch, I share that I am ending a 12-year relationship, feeling somewhat adrift. Long engages directly with my vulnerability, posing the question: “Okay, but when was it really over?” Her insightful question disarms me, prompting a reflection on clarity and grace in times of transition.

Long’s own journey has not been without challenge. In 2022, she faced public scrutiny following a cheating scandal that ended her long-term relationship. However, she addresses this difficult period with an admirable level of composure. While she appreciates the support she received, she expresses a nuanced understanding of the situation: “I’m proud of myself for giving so much grace,” she recounts, acknowledging the compassion necessary in life's most testing moments.

Through our discussion, Long advocates for self-love and healing as essential components in moving past trauma. “It’s not about another person’s behavior. You need to focus on your bottom line,” she advises, citing techniques like writing and meditation for managing emotional burdens. Her perspective encourages the idea of making room for personal growth, rather than being hindered by others’ actions.

Throughout our conversation, I notice Long instinctively finds meaning and lessons in every experience she discusses, suggesting a deep commitment to personal growth and transformation.

Currently, Long is tackling the demanding process of writing her first memoir, which she describes as both challenging and liberating. This venture stretches over two years, symbolizing an evolution of thoughts and emotions she continues to navigate.

“I can read something I wrote two years ago and see how I've changed,” she admits, recalling wisdom imparted by her late father, a poet. “He told me the hardest part of writing is knowing when to stop,” she reflects, contemplating her own journey of self-expression through this process.

The memoir also leads Long to revisit her childhood in Iowa City, where she spent formative years while her mother attended university. This experience highlighted her complex relationship with race and identity, as she recalls the rarity of seeing other Black girls. “Writing this memoir, I recognized how that experience shaped my view of beauty and self-acceptance,” she reveals. “I thought I was beautiful because my family said so, but the world presented a different narrative.”

Ironically, in becoming a celebrated face for Estée Lauder, Long recognizes the contradictions within the beauty standards she navigated. As a symbol of Black beauty for many, she addresses the pressure and scrutiny that comes with aging in the public eye: “I’m 55. I’ve got hormonal stuff going on. Your body shifts and changes.” Yet, she approaches this transition without regret, enjoying every moment, including indulging in truffle parmesan fries.

"I don’t deprive myself of anything I want," Long asserts, marrying a love for food with a philosophy of balance in her life.

Beauty has never been her primary measure of success; instead, it’s about embodying the values inherited from her parents—curiosity from her father and strong self-identity from her mother. Long recalls moments of childhood embarrassment while witnessing her mother’s unapologetic individuality, now recognizing the strength that came with it.

As lunch winds down and our plates are cleared, she prepares to head home for a pizza party with her youngest son and his friends. I ask her what freedom means to her today.

“Being able to do what you want to do when you want to do it, serving your spirit rather than conforming to outside expectations,” she reflects. “Freedom doesn’t require an audience. You don’t need permission to pursue what you love, whether it’s a grand stage or simply making a pizza in your kitchen.”